instagram: xdeeliaaa.
always trying to make fiction a reality

I havent said anything in awhile.. but basically I had my 21st party on saturday and the weather was great, food were great, my speeches were so much fun lol and my cake was mega awesomeeeeeee. Im so thankful to everybody in my life and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Life is good. GOD IS GOOD. Up till today ive been on this high and I like it. But I have a test tomorrow so I better get up from my bed and start memorising this vocab :(

Its only been 4 days… but feels like 4 months since I havent interacted with the dude. Why should I feel sad. I know I did the right thing and that I am doing the right thing and that he too is doing the right thing and so why just why does it feel like crap.

I turned 21 today. (yesterday really - its past 12am) and it was an ordinary day. except i cant help but feel just a little sad about helpdesk still. but its a new start! and i have amazing friends who wished me at midnight and it was heaps fun. and I did have a good day. I just wished this little sadness would leave. but thats just life and im gonna leave it at that. 

tomorrow its time to hit the books again and do my assignments! hopefully the new 21 year old me will be alot smarter and make better decisions in life. 

6. September 2014

yep. that’s it. finally ended things with the dude. not gonna say im happy but am a little sad that its all over. no more phone calls. no more facebook. no more messaging. no more late nights. and just no more of anything. its crazy how emotions really dictate your decisions. And in situations like this you cannot CANNOT rely on your emotions and how you feel. because that is just like a train travelling high speeds bound to crash. So in one sense, its good i got out early. even though i am sad and I am beating myself up because I know that I was the one that put myself in that position in the first place. if i didnt put myself in that place, i wouldn’t be feeling the way i am right now. guilt and shame, sadness. LIFE MOVES ON! It’s my 21st birthday tomorrow. I guess this will mark something new. It is also fathers day so i get to share it with my dad. anwyays, sad sad day for me but tomorrow is just around the corner and hopefully these feelings will go away asap so i can enjoy tomorrow as i turn a year older .

I started uni at 9am today but I ended up going at 10 because I hate waking up so early. Now its 521pm and its going to take more than an hour to get home because its peak hour and this bus driver’s driving is driving me nuts because he keeps jerking and ugh so annoying. But anyways other than that, today has been a good day. I made a new friend who looks korean but is not and its just like me and yay.